In an earlier blog I talked about J an interesting little character. J could well turn out to be the star of this Blog because it’s never a dull day when he’s around…
I’d been asked by Pete the head youth worker to lead the Wednesday club night for 7 – 11 year olds. I was quite happy to do this and so went about thinking up games, activities etc. I decided to do a game called the giant egg drop; some of you may be familiar with it. Basically, you have to design a capsule that will protect an egg when it is dropped from around 8ft using the materials provided (tissue paper, plastic bottles, string, celotape, straws). It sounded like a great plan because it would focus on the teams working together as a group, something the kids who come are not great at.
J arrived at the centre around 3:50pm and started a fight with a boy called F…. After this incident J calmed down and I have to say that he was one of the star performers in the giant egg drop. Instead of dropping the egg capsules from 8ft (me standing on a chair) we decided to drop them from the balcony that overlooks the games hall, it’s roughly about 20ft (whether anything could protect an egg dropping from that distance was something I didn’t even consider, I knew it would be fun!!) The activity went really well. I had been worried about getting their attention to explain everything but that went fine and the kids seemed pretty excited by the whole thing, which created a great atmosphere. All but one of the capsules was unable to protect the egg inside. The suspense between the capsule dropping and me opening it up to see if the egg had survived was excellent. The kids were totally engaged.
After the giant egg drop we played dodge ball, an energetic game enjoyed by most kids…. Most that is but not J. Sigh, it’s this whole issue of him not being involved. He hates it when nobody passes to him. It’s very difficult to deal with an issue like this because all the kids want to be passed the ball. By continually meeting J’s demands we won’t be doing him any favours. He has to come to terms with team games and dynamics, which is going to take a lot of persistence and patience, but I’ve got plenty of that. J became so agitated by the game that he walked out of the hall, out of the hall beside it where some kids were doing t-shirt painting, out of the reception area and out of the front door onto the street.
I clocked him leaving and walked after him, I was relieved to see that Becky one of the other leaders had also see him go. J was walking fast (I’m not sure where he was going) so I had to run to catch up with him and then I walked along beside him not quite sure what my next move should be. I spoke to him calmly and tried to focus his attention on anything but the issue in hand. He wasn’t having it though. I don’t know J very well at all and so did not feel in a position to use any amount physical force to stop him. With a child in tears and a street full of people I didn’t really know what to do. However, I remember watching ‘brat camp’ last week and when two girls decided to walk off from the group the leader just walked with them knowing that eventually they would stop… I hoped this would happen. Thankfully one of the other mum’s was passing and she grabbed J in a hug asking what had happened. I know her quite well and so I explained about the dodge ball and nobody passing to him. With J still in tears a man then stopped and asked what was wrong (he was quite aggressive in asking) and again we explained…. This man was very accusing in his manner and I felt a little defensive because although J was in tears we were just dealing with a dodgeball issue it wasn’t as if I had done something to upset him.
I’d been asked by Pete the head youth worker to lead the Wednesday club night for 7 – 11 year olds. I was quite happy to do this and so went about thinking up games, activities etc. I decided to do a game called the giant egg drop; some of you may be familiar with it. Basically, you have to design a capsule that will protect an egg when it is dropped from around 8ft using the materials provided (tissue paper, plastic bottles, string, celotape, straws). It sounded like a great plan because it would focus on the teams working together as a group, something the kids who come are not great at.
J arrived at the centre around 3:50pm and started a fight with a boy called F…. After this incident J calmed down and I have to say that he was one of the star performers in the giant egg drop. Instead of dropping the egg capsules from 8ft (me standing on a chair) we decided to drop them from the balcony that overlooks the games hall, it’s roughly about 20ft (whether anything could protect an egg dropping from that distance was something I didn’t even consider, I knew it would be fun!!) The activity went really well. I had been worried about getting their attention to explain everything but that went fine and the kids seemed pretty excited by the whole thing, which created a great atmosphere. All but one of the capsules was unable to protect the egg inside. The suspense between the capsule dropping and me opening it up to see if the egg had survived was excellent. The kids were totally engaged.
After the giant egg drop we played dodge ball, an energetic game enjoyed by most kids…. Most that is but not J. Sigh, it’s this whole issue of him not being involved. He hates it when nobody passes to him. It’s very difficult to deal with an issue like this because all the kids want to be passed the ball. By continually meeting J’s demands we won’t be doing him any favours. He has to come to terms with team games and dynamics, which is going to take a lot of persistence and patience, but I’ve got plenty of that. J became so agitated by the game that he walked out of the hall, out of the hall beside it where some kids were doing t-shirt painting, out of the reception area and out of the front door onto the street.
I clocked him leaving and walked after him, I was relieved to see that Becky one of the other leaders had also see him go. J was walking fast (I’m not sure where he was going) so I had to run to catch up with him and then I walked along beside him not quite sure what my next move should be. I spoke to him calmly and tried to focus his attention on anything but the issue in hand. He wasn’t having it though. I don’t know J very well at all and so did not feel in a position to use any amount physical force to stop him. With a child in tears and a street full of people I didn’t really know what to do. However, I remember watching ‘brat camp’ last week and when two girls decided to walk off from the group the leader just walked with them knowing that eventually they would stop… I hoped this would happen. Thankfully one of the other mum’s was passing and she grabbed J in a hug asking what had happened. I know her quite well and so I explained about the dodge ball and nobody passing to him. With J still in tears a man then stopped and asked what was wrong (he was quite aggressive in asking) and again we explained…. This man was very accusing in his manner and I felt a little defensive because although J was in tears we were just dealing with a dodgeball issue it wasn’t as if I had done something to upset him.
To make matters even worse two policeman suddenly appeared asking me questions “who was I?” and “what had happened?”… I explained who I was and why J was in tears and they told me about their duty of care and how they had to stop. The whole thing just got a bit mad really. Although in hindsight I’m thankful that these people were around to help settle J. Maybe it’s a good example of all the factors are going to have to work together to help J. He’s no doubt difficult but with the right amount of support from youth workers, family and friends and a certain respect for authority (the police) J will be just fine. When we got back to the centre J was sat down by Pete and spoken to about the dangers of leaving the centre. I’d like to think it won’t happen again but with J around you have to be prepared for anything….
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